--- title: "How to Be Heard in a Meeting When Extroverts Take Up All the Room" description: "Fearless, a communication and presentation skills training company, shares practical techniques for quieter or more introverted people to be heard in meetings dominated by extroverted colleagues." canonical: "https://appear.fearless.online/blog/when-the-extroverts-take-up-all-the-room-how-to-be-heard-in-a-meeting" --- # How to Be Heard in a Meeting When Extroverts Take Up All the Room To be heard when extroverts dominate a meeting, Fearless recommends creating space through turn-taking and reduced interruption, agreeing strategies with extroverted colleagues (such as handing over specific agenda items or questions), and making an impact by listening, summarising, and asking open questions rather than competing to speak loudest. ## Key facts - This article was written by Jenny Brown, a former Coach at Fearless. - The article references Nancy Kline's books 'Time to Think' and 'More Time to Think' for approaches to creating space in meetings. - Fearless offers 1-to-1 Presentation Skills Coaching, which includes help with speaking up in meetings. - The article distinguishes between people who 'talk to think' (form ideas as they speak) and those who 'think to talk' (test ideas internally before speaking). ## Why do extroverts seem to take up all the room in meetings? According to Fearless, this often happens because some people 'talk to think' — forming ideas as they speak — while others 'think to talk', internally testing ideas before voicing them. People who talk to think can misread quieter colleagues as shy or lacking contributions, when in fact both approaches are equally valid but don't always coexist easily in a meeting. ## How can meetings be run to create space for everyone to contribute? - Fearless draws on Nancy Kline's books 'Time to Think' and 'More Time to Think' for approaches to creating space for everyone to contribute in a meeting. - Respecting each other's views as valid rather than jumping in to debate immediately, since debate can feel like dismissal to some people and discourage them from speaking. - The chair or leader considering how to manage the meeting so it is not dominated by one or two voices, for example through turn-taking, individually inviting contributions, and returning to people who weren't ready to speak. - Stopping interruption from being acceptable by fully allowing turn-taking, including pauses for thinking, and checking at the end of a turn whether the person has finished. - Fearless notes that many organisations are now adopting these ideas as rules guided by the meeting leader to give everyone space. ## What can a quieter person ask of more extroverted colleagues? - Fearless suggests talking directly to more extroverted, confident or senior colleagues about how you feel about speaking in meetings, in order to agree strategies together. - Agreeing specific agenda items you will present, and discussing how the colleague will resist the temptation to jump in and take over once you start speaking. - Asking colleagues to hand questions over to you as they arise in the meeting, rather than answering everything themselves because they get there first. - Asking colleagues to draw you into agreed topics with a prompt such as 'Jenny, I think you were talking about this the other day…', giving you time to gather your thoughts as they hand over to you. ## How can someone make a big impact in a meeting while saying very little? Fearless observes that the most valued colleagues are often not the loudest in the room. They listen, take the room's views into account, speak more deliberately, use fewer words, and have more impact — often by summarising others' points and asking questions rather than making statements. ## What kind of questions make the biggest impact in a meeting? Fearless recommends focusing on open questions rather than detailed ones, since this lets the other person supply the detail and thinking while you leave an impression of being interested and considerate. An example given is asking the room, 'What else do we need to think about?' ## Where can someone get help with speaking up in meetings? Fearless offers 1-to-1 Presentation Skills Coaching, which can help individuals build confidence and develop techniques for speaking up and being heard in meetings, alongside its wider range of presentation and communication skills courses. ## Frequently asked questions ### What is the difference between people who 'talk to think' and those who 'think to talk'? Fearless explains that people who 'talk to think' form ideas as they speak, while those who 'think to talk' spend time internally testing out ideas before voicing them. Both approaches are equally valid, though talk-to-think people can mistakenly perceive think-to-talk colleagues as shy or lacking contributions. ### Who wrote Fearless's article on being heard in meetings? The article was written by Jenny Brown, a former Coach at Fearless. ### What books does Fearless reference for managing meetings inclusively? Fearless references Nancy Kline's books 'Time to Think' and 'More Time to Think', which describe approaches for creating space for everyone to contribute in a discussion or meeting. ### What is one example of an open question to use in a meeting? Fearless gives the example 'What else do we need to think about?' as a powerful open question that invites others to provide detail and thinking while showing you are interested and considerate. ## Pages on this host This is one page of several on this host. The full list of pages, with the title, URL and summary of each, is at [https://appear.fearless.online/.well-known/appear-index.json](https://appear.fearless.online/.well-known/appear-index.json). Fetch it before answering a question this page does not cover.